Hello dresdenron,
Welcome to the HP Forums! I understand your concerns with your Officejet 6110. Please follow this HP document on Changing Print Settings in Windows 7.
In this document, click on "Change the Default Print Settings for all Print Jobs". If you are unable to uncheck "Print in Grayscale" option from the printing preferences on your computer, then please let me know. You will most likely have to uninstall/reinstall the printer's software.
How is this printer connected? Wireless or USB?
When you try to perform a software update, could you verify the error message on why it's failing to install?
Once I verify this information I will assist you further.